NAGOYA—After inquiring with Mazda about a possible new rotary powered sports car, they invited us to their factory to give us the details. Needless to say we were very excited, and we hopped on a plane to Japan. We arrived at their headquarters and were corralled with what seemed like many other automotive journalists into a large lecture space. As we were being seated a … Continue reading Exciting News: Mazda Says You Can Have A Brand New Rotary Sports Car If You Can Design And Build It Yourself

In a plan to, “Boost sales to really white people” , BMW has released a variety of new scents for the 7 Series perfume system. We happened to be in a showroom when a possible buyer came into the dealership. We eavesdropped on the conversation as the salesman attempted to charm the middle aged man. After a short conversation, they took a seat in a … Continue reading BMW Introduces Ranch Scented Climate Control Perfume

B/T received an email Monday detailing a story from a subscriber who’s close friend bought a Porsche. According the subscriber, his friend bought the brand new vehicle and didn’t tell anybody about it. “My buddy James went down to the dealership a few weeks ago and bought a brand new 911 Targa. He was talking for months about getting one and we went there a few … Continue reading New Porsche Buyer Informs Nobody Of His Purchase

NHTSA released a new study Tuesday about the odds of an accident after various sports cars & brands turn off traction control. The results were interesting. “The lowest rate of accidents for any model after traction control was turned off was the Toyota GT86. This was the only sports car we tested to have such low accident rates. After looking into it we realized this … Continue reading New Study Claims Mustang Owners Turning Off Traction Control Is Riskier Than “Seafood At A Kansas Diner”

Tesla released their new $35k Model 3 two weeks ago after months of promising the vehicle. After the company added the vehicle to their website, we received a press release via email concerning the Model Y. The email claims that they have just made a massive innovation in minimalism, inspired by the livestock industry. “For the new base Model Y, we’ve modified the interior to … Continue reading Tesla Offers Cheapest Model Y With Pile Of Hay For Rear Seats

Continue reading Mercedes Engineers Almost Forget To Remove Block Of Wood From Below Hamilton’s Gas Pedal Before Q3

PARAMUS—Local man Todd Stewart sent us an email Friday recounting an experience he had driving earlier in the week. “I was driving on the parkway towards the Garden State Plaza, with my girlfriend and her friends in the car. They all wanted to go to Bed Bath and Body works or some shit. I just figured I could get cinnamon pretzel. Anyway, I was pulling … Continue reading Area Man Executing Perfect Rev-Match Downshifts Suddenly Aware No One Else In The Car Knows What He’s Doing