Mclaren CEO Wakes Up In Cold Sweat After Third C8 Corvette Nightmare This Week

“I have sixty grand in my pocket right now to spend on a new car, you’re telling me you can’t do anything for me?”

The Mclaren dealership employee began to get nervous.

“W-well no. The cheapest car we have is the 540c, and that’s $165,000.”

“And that’s SLOWER than the new Corvette to sixty, right? Like, a LOT slower. Like HALF a SECOND slower. Right?”

The words seemed to come out of the customer’s mouth in slow motion as the employee began to stare aimlessly into the distance. The words struck him like punches in the gut.

“Hey, hello? I’m talking to you here.”

The employee snapped back into reality.

“Y-yeah but this is a Mclaren. It’s worth the badge.”

“Oh yeah! I forgot. I’m gonna pay another hundred grand to get walked on the highway by some good ol’ boy named Cleatus and his fat brother Roy!”

The employee slowly began fidgeting and had sweaty palms. He felt his knees grow weak.

“So the Z06 Vette’ is probably gonna be faster, cheaper, as capable, and more powerful than even the 570s. Why wouldn’t I just wait a year and get a better car for less money?”

The employee at this point was near collapse.

“OH, and I can actually put things in the Chevy! And there’s no way the Corvette is gonna be anywhere near as expensive to maintain as any of these cars. It also sounds a LOT better. I could even finance it if I wanted to! Also th-”

“Hey, hey are you okay? You don’t look so g-”

The employee collapsed and everything went black. Mclaren’s CEO shot up from his bed in a cold sweat.

“SIXTY GRAND! SIXTY! AH! AH!”

He looked around in a panic, recovering from his frantic, comatose state.

“Oh, it was… It was just a dream.”

He reached over to his night stand and unlocked his smartphone. Just then an email notification came up from Jalopnik.

“MCLAREN CEO MUST BE PISSING HIS PANTS: $60K C8 VETTE WALKS 540C LIKE IT’S IN REVERSE”

30 thoughts on “Mclaren CEO Wakes Up In Cold Sweat After Third C8 Corvette Nightmare This Week

    1. Yeah I can’t wait that long. Pre order is in! I can’t wait til it comes. You can have mine in 3 years after I’m done with it

  1. Do you seriously believe McLaren is scared of the C8…??… Any such belief indicates a lack of understanding of car buyers and their preferences .. Nobody and I mean nobody, who is considering a McLaren is gonna walk out of a dealership with a C8…

    1. Well you obviously arent taking into consideration buyers like me. I could care less what badge either car has or what it looks like. They could both be brown with unicorns painted all over it. I only give a crap about how it feels once Im having at it on a track. If one car feels better than the other, and feels more competent at the limit, then thats the car I get. I dont give a shit about how many panties itll drop

    2. With McLaren’s absolutely spotty track record on reliability, massive repair costs and ludicrous warranty pricing, the questions is, WHY would you even consider a McLaren when there are alternatives. BTW, Ferrari, Lamborghini, Bugatti, Koenigsegg, Pagani ect all have such ridiculous maintenance costs, that if your a person that simply wants to drive that dame machine without worrying about depreciation, resale, mileage or wear and tear or door digs the new Corvette is the clear winner. Flog the F__ out of it and when it wears out, buy 2 more and your still under the McLaren’s price tag!

    3. Don’t be so sure. There are absolutely some people buying a McLaren for the name. But the c8 really will draw people that actually drive their cars and track them, which will draw from every sports car and super car brand with more expensive vehicles.

    1. ZR1 is cheaper but sure as hell is slower than a 720s stock vs stock. Look up Drag Times on YouTube and look for yourself, the ZR1 loses everytime.

  2. Apples to oranges. The McLaren will retain much of its value, not so much for the Chevy… especially after Cleatus and his fat brother Roy infuse the interior with alcohol and body odor and beat the snot out if it for 5 years

    1. Um….. go look on AutoTrader, CarGurus or any of the other used car sites. McLarens are not holding value at all.

  3. Sure but as soon as the C8 is in any kind of wreck, it’ll pretty much always get totalled for parts as the labour charge to take everything apart & put it all back together again will be more than the car is worth. Plus the McLaren is a supercar with pedigree hyper-car family members. The C8 is neither of those….

    1. The “Corvette” brand has how may GT1, GTLM, etc drivers championships & manufacturers championships in WEC American Le Mans & IMSA…….yeah right no heritage….. .

    2. Corvette does have a racing pedigree….50 years of it. The Corvette looks really good too. Just wait and give it a chance before judgment is made. The C8 is finally the supercar everyone had been wanting for decades. No reason for snobbery here. The C8 will be a collectors car because of its importance as the first Chevy supercar. When the Z06 and ZR1 arrives…………..we will see what’s left standing.

  4. As an owner for many years of an unrestored 1972 manual roadster my experience is the Vette is the cheapest car I have ever owned and a smile a mile. Sounds great looks a million dollars. Got 7 other nice cars for fun the Vette is the best buy a C8 and keep it for 45 years worth the money in fun.

  5. Im a vette fan. Always have been , always will. I wouldnt have the mclaren in my driveway unless I could sell it next week!

  6. Looks like ” if you’re going to show up to the dance ” be sure you’re wearing a Bow Tie 😎

  7. The article was silly and fun, even if having no basis in any form of reality.

    I’m a retired guy who has watched Corvette from a distance, having no more interest than passing curiosity. Not my car, not my people. This C8 however, actually has me doing some thinking. This is a brave, smart entry on the part of GM.

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