Toyota To Accept First Born As Down Payment For New Supra

Toyota announced on Tuesday that it will begin accepting first-born children as a down payment for the all-new Z4-based Supra. 

“The program will accept only male children of adequate size and weight,” said Ed Laukes, Toyota’s North American VP of Marketing. 

“While we are considering accepting female children, the BMI specs would be more stringent.” 

“Perhaps we could offer a 2-for-1 deal.” 

As expected, the new Supra is already fetching enormous sums for dealers, with some marked up 350% over MSRP. 

“Every other inexplicably rich car Youtuber has at least a hundred grand burning a hole in his pocket,” said one prominent Florida dealership owner. 

“And maybe a kid. Who knows?” 

“We sold the Demon for $120k over MSRP and that thing is about as useful as a snow cone in a blizzard. We’re not worried. We have a great daycare setup, and most of the kids can already say Toyotathon.” 

When B/T reached out to speak to prospective owners about the new program, the response was overwhelmingly positive. 

“Where do I drop him off at?” asked Lee Phelps, father of three. “I’ve got two I don’t really need. That B58 is nice. One, two kids? That’s a fair deal.” 

When asked what Toyota would do with the down payment children, Ed Laukes was mum on the subject. 

“We’re don’t know yet, really. A lot of salesmen want some kids.” 

“Maybe set up a couple little league teams? Supra Sluggers? Take the whole thing on the road? Little sports betting in there? Not sure yet.” 

4 thoughts on “Toyota To Accept First Born As Down Payment For New Supra

  1. Is there an age limit? I have a first born Male age 23 but he’s really immature for his age and maybe Toyota can get more out of him than we can and for a new Supra he’s all yours.


  2. I love the sarcasm. Almost as funny as idiots paying more than $5,000 over MSRP for a car, when the third or fourth month they’ll be discounting them since they won’t be able to move them.
    I get it, I sold cars for well over 14 years, and have sold several new, hot items for well over MSRP. I will not do that myself, because I know the game, and know the hot ones will soon be overshadowed by another, “new/now/next” vehicle, and they will be discounting then in order to get them off their lots. Or some iduot dealerships will price themselves out of a sale because they are not the only game in town, and eventually their competitors will lower their price and sell their stock. Since these cars have limited buyers and not limited production, they will sit on lots and actually cost the dealership money.


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