UNITED STATES — Following the removal of the press embargo last Sunday, car enthusiasts nationwide were reported to be pretty pissed off that the reviews of the fifth-generation Toyota Supra have generally been favorable.
Several automotive journalists have extended praise to the Supra’s only available transmission, which is an eight-speed automatic and uses a traditional torque converter. The gearbox has been dubbed responsive, quick, and well-calibrated.
This has annoyed millions of car enthusiasts, who insist the car should have been available with a manual.
“You can’t even get it with a stick,” complained Sacramento teenager Damien Peterson, who has a poster of a LaFerrari taped to his bedroom wall. “I don’t see how an automatic ‘sports car’ can be good. These people must be shilling for Toyota.”
The Supra has also been praised for its exterior styling, much to the dismay of gearheads across the country. Many reviewers have used such words as “striking,” “thrilling,” and “exciting” to describe the design.
Enthusiasts, however, vehemently disagree, insisting that the design should not have deviated even slightly from the FT-1 concept, which previewed the Supra a few years ago.
“The headlights are so much bigger in the production model,” said Philadelphia millennial Steve Jacobs, “and all the vents are fake. Are these journalists blind?”
Jacobs was unable to confirm whether the vents on the concept were functional.
The final significant point of tension between automotive journalists and enthusiasts is the Supra’s BMW underpinnings. Reviewers have commended the Supra for its interior quality, state-of-the-art technology, and “fantastic” inline-six engine, all of which are lifted straight from its BMW cousin.
Car fanatics, however, feel differently, clamoring that Toyota should have reused its legendary 2JZ engine.
“I can’t believe they like all that BMW crap,” said Seattle gearhead Mike Brannon. “BMW is not known for interior quality, performance cars, or inline six-cylinder engines. Are these guys even real car people?”
According to sources, many of these car enthusiasts were last seen scouring the Internet for a scathing review of the 2020 Supra to affirm their pre-existing biases.